Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Creating Through Grief

Today has not been a successful art day for me as you can see from this image:

I have redone and reworked this mermaid at least 4 times so far. Adding a face, painting it out, doing a new one...over and over. At one point today I had her in the trash bin and later I was scrolling online and saw this one painting, and I thought "Mine looks better than that". So I dug my mermaid out of the trash bin and started painting out and sanding over her face yet again. I don't know where this will finally end, or even if I should be trying to paint anything today. Sometimes it is therapeutic and sometimes it's frustrating.

One of my friends of 30+ years is dying at any moment. I jerked awake dozens of times last night when I thought of her, so the sleep was more of a nightmare than anything restful. I'm doing what I can to process this event and although it is a part of life, it is one of the most difficult parts to accept. Even though you know it all comes to an end for all of us at some point in time you still have to go through all of the emotions that come with the territory. Death is not a new thing to me and I have already lost dozens of people that I loved very much.

None of that seems to matter when Mr. Death comes calling. I do not have the same view of death as most people do, either. But even with a reincarnation viewpoint about life and how it continues it's still not any easier to experience. I'm just dealing with this as best I can, and moving on when I am ready. Today it is music, a walk on the beach, some more art, and whatever emotions come out are okay with me.

10 comments:

  1. That is the key, whatever emotions come out are OKAY ... my sincere thoughts are with you!

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    1. Thanks much, Cherie!!! It's great to have friends around like you to offer courage and understanding. xoxoxox

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  2. Sorry You are going through a very difficult time...my thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend. Big hugs!

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    1. Thank you, Maria! Appreciate the hugs...........

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  3. Just stopping by the blogs of other 29faces people! So sorry to hear about your friend. I am glad you have your art to help you through this difficult time. Continue to be wise and gentle with yourself.

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    1. Trish, thank you, sweetheart. I am taking my time with this experience and didn't even get my 29 Faces completed for Feb. But it's okay. There will be other challenges.

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  4. You had me giggling , poor mermaid! At least she is out of the trash bin :o) She looks like she will have a nice ending.
    About your friend, I am so sorry to hear that. So young! I just learned about a dear friend of mine, who had past away months ago and I had no idea... I still can't believe it. yes it is part of life, but it's a part no one likes to think about. Long time ago a friend told me after the passing of her grandmother: "We don't cry because the person is dead, we cry because we won't see them anymore" Which is true and very sad.
    Anyway Deb, I send you a big hug, and my prayers for your friend and her family

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    1. Martha, you little cutie pie! I'm glad that you saw this post so you know why I didn't get my 29 Faces completed for the challenge. I'll catch the next one when it comes time for that.

      We are facing some interesting times with our friends and family at this phase of our lives, eh? Not much can be done to change it or make it easier.

      But I certainly don't know what I would do without my art.

      xoxoxoxox

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